Family Dynamics of Caregiving - Part 2

Jeremy Nachtigall • August 6, 2021

In Part 1 of "Family Dynamics of Caregiving", I discussed the impact on family dynamics while acting as a caregiver.  Here's how you can make the process less stressful.


It’s important to implement a “division of labor” type strategy. Since I was in the

house, I took on the financial, administrative, and logistical elements of running the

house while one sister managed the health-related aspects and my other sister

managed the daily scheduling and transportation. As expected our duties were

constantly overlapping. This made what could have been an unmanageable situation,

manageable. 

Many times, debating who, what and how much care should be provided becomes a futile exercise that causes conflict and even more stress. In fact, after my mom got sick, I was diagnosed with hypertension that was due to the added stress I was experiencing. It is a good choice to consult with a Daily Money Manager, who has experience in negotiating these types of family dynamics, to help guide you in your decision-making.


If you don’t have these conversations, you and your family members may be at opposite ends of the spectrum with emotions running high, and remember, never make these types of decisions in a hyper emotional state. Some family members may feel that a long term care facility is in the best interest of their loved one, some may feel that in home care is best. Another child may feel that not enough is being done by the others to keep mom or dad home. I recommend having multiple family meetings and following an agenda weekly, monthly, or quarterly so that all family members are on the same page and responsibilities can be delegated. This will limit the number of disagreements and will result in everyone feeling that they are valued and their opinions heard. A DMM can help facilitate these meetings.


In Part 3 of "Family Dynamics of Caregiving", I'll discuss how you can address what is in your family member's best interests and who should take charge.

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